I Just Blogged your Blog: An Experiment in Meta-Blogging pt. III

Rebecca Thinks... ( http://rebzugo.blogspot.com)

Name: Rebecca
Location: Montreal, Canada
Blogging Since: November 2006

Summary: Ever worry that you think everything you say is real witty, but turns out it's really just retarded and obnoxious? Rebecca doesn't. Or she just doesn't care. This whole thing is kind of like Timecube but written by a 17 year old schitzophrenic who goes to Canadian public high school. Trying to force your brain to absorb some of the stuff she writes is kind of like trying to get nutrients out of eating wood.


Choice Quotes:


"She just said "What the heck does the Earth being round have anything to do with you having a sister?" Obviously, we are not all functioning on the same level of mental capacity, here.

Here is a deep and meaningful message she would like to relay to the entire online community:

"I do have mental capacity. And I bet you can't solve this equation... No, write it, write it. Ok! Um... can I write it?"

The problem is as follows:

2 (5A + -3A) - 10 = 100

I shall now prove that I, Rebzugo, have passed highschool math, albeit one year behind.

2 (5A + -3A) - 10 = 100
2 (2A) - 10 = 100
4A - 10 = 100
4A = 110
A = 28.33

Not only this, but as we were calculating, sans calculator a la 1544, my dear sister several times put into question my mathematical abilities. In addition, in several instances, her very intelligent yet slightly less-developed in years brain committed several oversights which are to be expected of today's youngins, not like in my day."


Frankenstein Says: Forget mathematical abilities. What about her sister's sanity? What would you do if your sibling came up to you and started forming obscure relations between your existence, the shape of planetary bodies and high-school algebra?
Balls Says: The human brain is by far the most complicated object we have ever found in the universe. Nothing even comes close to that wrinkly ball of flesh and 10 billion synaptic neurons. Yet at times, that complixity fails mankind in paradoxial ways.
Justin Says:
Pat Says:




"After we walked out of German 201 this morning, Sprachkurs Deutsch, our textbook, took me aside and held me by the shoulders. He seemed nervous. And then, after introducing himself to me as Matti's cousin, he confessed his love for me.

I do not know what to do. Sprachkurs and I have always have a special chemistry together.

I went home in tears. There, in my room, I contemplated dropping German 201, but I knew this would upset you, especially considering the crap-ass oral presentations we have yet to unleash on the class and that girl who always asks questions.

Looking for consolation, I explained my problems to my old Italian textbook, Parole Nel Contesto, from my Italian School days... he listened with patience.

Then, just as I was leaving, he confessed his affection for me as well. The twist is that I always thought Parole was a girl."

Frankenstein Says: This might be a great time to take advantage of a Canadian state-funded mental health care facility.
Balls Says: I have never talked to books. Books talk to ME.
Justin Says:
Pat Says:




"In other news, I am looking to name my personally disastrous week. Perhaps this will materialize into a You Tube video-perhaps not. You know; in the way that natural disasters get named, so should my disaster, I figure. Here are some of its stars:

- Forgot locker combination.
- Water bottle spilled all over bag.
- Wallet got all stretched because of water.
- Books very expensive.
- Computer couldnt access my profile, made new one.
- Spent lots of time trying to fix my slow internet.
- Forgot various passwords; WebCt, school library search, PIN number to log into student ID account...
- Had a marital disagreement with a photocopier.
- Could not find classes, was late.
- Tuesday; woke up a half hour after I was supposed to leave (!) my house.
- Tore nylons.
- Am sick.
- No money."



Frankenstein Says: This kind of reminds me of one of those Sandra Bullock movies where a nerdy, awkward girl spends the first half of the movie ramming her head into shit and getting into embarassing situations and the second half of the movie becoming prom queen. Rebecca takes klutziness to such a level that at her prom she'll probably drown in the punch bowl.
Balls Says: Huh. These disasters are all of the self-inflicted type.
Justin Says:
Pat Says:




"Woody Allen, my secret boyfriend, has a part in his movie Love and Death, at the end, when two women are saying "Wheat. Wheat. Nothing but wheat..." and he adds "I'm dead, they're talking about wheat." In the same vein, I present this blog entry to the world as a late Kwanzaa gift.

(Mr. Allen, if you are reading... let's get married. I am single! The age difference is minor.)"


Frankenstein Says: Parents, it's normal for your teenage girls to have crushes on celebrities. Owen Wilson, Matt LeBlanc, Clive Owen...all perfectly healthy. However, if your daughter somehow has managed to form a crush on Woody Allen, you are severely fucked. Bonus: Woody would probably take her up on her offer.
Balls Says: Poor Woody.
Justin Says:
Pat Says:

"If I were from Hong-Kong, I would protest.

Not over political issues. Not over social issues, either. Not over tissues.

Not even over the imitation turkey they serve in the office lunchroom. They think we don't notice?

No; none of these issues would be drastic enough to spark my Rosie the Riveter-like angst. On the other hand, have you ever checked out the Ikea site for Hong Kong? http://www.ikea.com.hk/chi/main.html It's ugly as all hell.

Hong Kong, you got ripped off."

Frankenstein Says: Owned.
Balls Says:It will be interesting to see how receptive HK is to Swedish furniature. Chinese consumers will be forced to choose between East and West.
Justin Says:
Pat Says:



Final Review:

Wordiness Score: !!! (like listening to a derelict ranting in the streets, but not too many posts)
Zaniness Score: :D :D :D (are you excited yet?)
Emo Score: o_\\ o_\\ (all teenagers count as at least 2 emoheads)
WTF Score: ????? (Reading this blog too closely will teleport you into an alternate dimension of confusion and woe...)
Pix Score: .jpg .jpg (weak)



Verdict: If certain types of thought could be categorized as an infectious disease that attacks and damages healthy thought processes, then congratulations and welcome to the world of internet rabies.